If I had a plan maybe I'd feel better about this

but probably I wouldn't

Of course I had to start this on a Wednesday.* Some of you may remember my old Wednesdays, which I started in almost the same fashion as I’m starting this: No plan, no idea what this… thing is going to be, no real sense of anything barring a desperate need for both constraints and accountability. And now that two (2!!!) people have somehow opted in for the paid version of this non-existent non-thing – thank you, by the way, and also I’m sorry? – I certainly have nailed the accountability part.

Someone recently said to me “Leah, no one reads anymore” when I told her I was thinking of doing this. I think maybe she’s right, so I might throw the occasional video in or maybe even a podcast. Definitely some photos. But the problem with people telling me “no one reads anymore” is that, unfortunately, people also tell me “Leah, you’re a writer.” Even worse, I like to write. So here we are.

I recently got an email from a guy about a Verge column I wrote (and sadly did not edit nearly as much as I should have, click at your own risk) in 2016. I get these emails on occasion. Sometimes it’s a person who’s tracked down my personal email to ask me for advice, which I heartlessly never give because I don’t have a column anymore, and I’m worried that opening the door to advice-via-email is asking for trouble. Other times, like this most recent one, it’s a person who’s tracked down my personal email to tell me they opened a browser, searched desperately for an answer to a problem they were having, and stumbled on something I wrote seven or eight years ago. This guy told me how something I wrote was the thing he needed to hear, the exact thing to make him finally pause in his endlessly unhappy pattern and go “Oh. That. That’s it. It’s what I have to stop doing.” Then he said this:

“Thank you for writing that and helping people out and showing such tremendous empathy. It inspired me to do the same. To help others and to shine for myself, so others can shine too.”

That particular column was about falling in love with people who are unavailable. It was about idealizing the unattainable and chasing after the impossible, which is of course is really a way to avoid reality, learn what is possible, and work with what you’ve got.

Oh.

That’s it.

It’s what I have to stop doing.

I tried using the AI image generator and typed in “FML” and this is what it gave me

Let’s pause, because you’re probably wondering two things at this point:

1. Why did I subscribe to this

   1. if I paid for it, can I get a refund

2. Why is it called Meets Most

I definitely don’t know the answer to no.1a, but I can take a stab at no.1: You like me and you’ve liked something I’ve written in the past. You already know that whatever I do here, it’ll be a combination of many things, like my thoughts on tech, culture, life, personal growth, feelings, the world. You know, the usual Leah mélange.

It will also be kind of a workshop of sorts. Me, in real time, processing a specific unhappy pattern that I think a lot of you have also experienced, and attempting instead to learn what is possible and work with what I’ve got.

In other words, it’ll be what I always do: A mix of the personal and the universal, in varying measures, with a lot of analogies and metaphors, and hopefully some dumb jokes.

As for no.2, that one I really can answer! But you’ll have to stick around for the next installment. Two things I want to get better at are: editing myself and tossing out smaller bits of this big treasure pile I have rather than trying to throw the whole thing over the fence at once. I’ll explain that analogy another time. Anyway, you’re all coming on this journey with me, and I’m genuinely excited (and deeply terrified).

Until next time!

Lxx

*Yes, I know this is going out on a Thursday but I set the newsletter up on a Wednesday so that counts in my book.

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Three recommendations from me, if recommendations are your thing:

1. Edit the apps that show up in your Siri Suggestions (if you have an iPhone) – you know, the grid of apps that appear when you pull down to search for something. I recently removed IG from the suggestions and my IG usage has gone waayyyyyyy down. It really helps with that weird automatic muscle memory thing, when you go to the app and realize you went there purely out of habit or boredom.

2. My Old Flame by Deborah Lippmann – the perfect red nail polish

3. Lucia Berlin’s short stories, especially A Manual For Cleaning Women. I’m currently reading Evening in Paradise and it’s astonishing to me how quickly and completely she builds entire worlds. It’s like watching someone sketch an entire scene with only a few lines. Funny, these are two things I want to learn how to do – write fiction and draw.